Me Again...

It's been a pretty quiet week around here. Not much to tell...

My book club started back up last Thursday, after a couple of months holiday break.
Confession: I don't always read the books they recommend, but I do enjoy going just for the social interaction. This is a fun group of ladies, and the always have a lot of news to share.
This month we are reading "The Help" by Kathryn Stockett
Liking it so far...

A few weeks ago, I had a surprise at work. A lady came up to me and introduced herself saying that she just wanted to meet the other Pat Taylor.

When the new Payson Temple was announced in Conference, someone started a group on facebook, and I left a comment there.
A few days later, I had a note in my box from this lady saying that she was also Pat Taylor, and that she wanted to know a little bit about her "twin."
We chatted back and forth for a while, but I never thought I would actually meet her.
Fun. :-)

I went to the Doc yesterday - (Ear nose & throat specialist) (Still working on the thyroid issue.)
He recommended just watching it for a year - until I mentioned that we'd be out of insurance in a few months. He said then that I should probably not mess around with it, and just get it out.
I have mixed feelings about that - I would like the symptoms gone, but I was hoping medication could take care of that.

He said that where it often helps shrink the tumor, that it doesn't relieve the symptoms. (Bummer) He also said that the biopsy I had doesn't always guarantee that there is no cancer, (since it only takes in a few small samples of the area.)

I'm not so much worried about that as just the thoughts of more surgery.
With all the issues I have, it's complicated. I've been really lucky so far, but who knows when that luck will run out - you know?

I have a month to think about it and decide.

It snowed yesterday. I was almost glad to see it.
It's been so nice this past week, that I've been thinking of spring and heading to the garden. Anyone from here knows it's waaay too early to be even thinking about that! It will be (at least) May before it's safe to expose helpless seedlings to the hazards of this climate.

The seed catalogs started coming in January, nevertheless, and I have been wishing and dreaming...

I've wanted to change my front flower bed for a couple of years, but haven't quite figured out what I want there yet.
I've been looking at these small ornamental kale - odd for a front flower bed, I know, but I think they're kind of pretty. I was going to get some in last year, but I was too late to find them...

And I would love me some of these green mums, but I'm not having much luck finding them either...


Plenty of time to dream...
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Great? .....Not so Much.

Gonna snark a little today, so cover your ears... (eyes?)

*So, you know that fun day I spent playing with the gran's this week?
I was informed last night that one of them has a serious case of strep.
Poor girl. Instead of the typical headache and sore throat, she broke out with a horrendous rash all over her body.
Swell.

*Hubby said that he found me a great new job. ...On board the Titanic.
(his sinking place of business)
...Hmmm. What should I do?

*Made a discovery this week - I hate the morning shift.
I am SO not a morning person.

Oh, and did I mention...

We had just sat down to dinner the other night, when hubby got a phone call.
It was our son who had just got off the bus at the park & ride, only to find that his truck (the old one that we just sold him) was missing.

Hubby jumped up and went to pick him up. He took him home and called the police.
...Hours later when hubby came home, he said that they had found out that the truck had not been stolen - it had been impounded.

There has been some kind of glitch in the system at the DMV that has earmarked our cars as being unlicensed (even though they clearly have tags displayed on the licence plates) and showing us with no insurance.
- And for some reason, they've been sending all that info to my son's house instead of ours, as if they are registered to him.

My daughters were out shopping on Saturday, when she got pulled over. Made some calls - same thing is going on with her car. She's been afraid to drive it all week until they can get it straightened out.

Guess what? Son got the warning for MY car this week.
...Do I dare drive it to work?

Very expensive mistake that someone else made on our behalf.

Oy Vey.

Good news? Day off tomorrow.
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Grandma Day

Monday being a holiday, and the kids being out of school, (and I off work - wonder of wonders) I thought it would be a good day for a grandma day with the girlies.

They've been asking since before Christmas to have a card-making day - and I got lots of fun new "toys" for Christmas that needed testing...

So, it was a date.

They came over around noon. At first, they busied themselves just plastering stickers to paper... but as they would come to my craft room for supplies, they would see something interesting and ask "what does this do?"
Soon we were peculating with the big guns - the Quickutz, the embossing dies, the ribbon & embellies...

It's so fun having this interest in common to share with them! We had so much fun.

Around 3, I was starting to get the shakes from running the stairs and bending over the table, so I poured out some Chex mix for some carb therapy. The girls descended on it like a plague of locusts.
Then Millie looked up at me and said - "Grandma, did you know we didn't have lunch?"
Well, how could I know that? (Although I should have assumed - seems their parents always send them here hungry...)

Anyway, we took a break for a full fledged lunch.

By the time we finished, it seems the wind had gone out of the sails for all of us. The spirit was still willing, but the flesh was weak...

While they finished eating, I started cleaning up. Soon their dad came to pick them up - seems they had a karate practice to go to, so timing couldn't have worked out better.
(They performed with their Karate class at a Jazz game on Tuesday.)

My back was hurting, so I laid down - just for a minute, before starting dinner...
When I woke up 5 hours later, dinner was over, and it was time for bed! LOL
(I love my patient family!)

The girls are old enough now to learn some fun things - I think I'll teach them to make squash books and maybe a necklace next time - can't wait!
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Winter White

I went for a drive yesterday - down to the land of turkeys and sheep, to visit my daughter at school. I was a little anxious about going, because there's a lot of snow out there and I didn't know what the roads would be like.
(They're an icy mess in front of my house...)

I made a quick trip to the library to get a book on CD to listen to on the way down. I wanted to kick myself when I discovered that I had gotten there without a pair of glasses!
(This has been happening a lot lately.)
Have you ever tried to choose a book by touch?
Yeah. It doesn't work.

I had to pull each one off the shelf and hope the titles were big enough to see semi-blind. I finally found one I hadn't read by an author that I like, so I checked it out - whether it would have been my first choice or not...

As usual, I worried needlessly. The roads were clear and dry, and it was smoooooth sailing. The only thing near to a problem that I had was that with the snow cover over everything, landmarks were camouflaged and it was a little disorienting.
Until I started coming to the little towns, I wasn't always sure where I was.

It was beautiful though. Miles and miles of sparkling untouched snow.
I love it - like looking at a vast, perfectly frosted cake.

In my younger days, I would have liked nothing better than to plow through every inch of it (or at least as much as possible...)
But these days I'm perfectly content viewing it from the interior of my heated cruising "bubble."

That thought brings a fresh memory to mind...

A few weeks ago, we had the girls here for the kids' weekly date night. It had snowed the whole time as we snuggled in front of cartoon after cartoon, so by the time their parents got here, there was about a foot laying on the ground.

As we sat visiting with the kids, a cold blast told me that the little one (who can't sit still for a minute,) had escaped through the front door.

I ran up the stairs and found her plowing trails through the virgin snow, laughing and giggling as she went.
(Thankfully, she had thought to put on her snow boots first - not a given for this child!)

I so wish I had caught that moment on film - I've played it in my mind a hundred times since.

It was the perfect expression of pure unadulterated JOY.

We ran into my daughter in law's sister as we were shopping for groceries.
I had posted on facebook that I would be in town, but I marveled at the chances that we would be in the same place at the same time - until I thought about it some more...
We would have had to be at Wally World or McDonald's - no other places to hang out down there. :-) Always fun to see her.

I covered all the bases with my daughter and felt good about the trip.
The ride home always feels so much shorter than getting there for some reason.
The sun was just beginning to dip in behind the hills, casting pink and blue shadows across the sparkling snow...

Hard to keep one's eyes on the road.

The rest of the week is mine, but there is laundry to do and calls to make...

Later.
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Total Bust

Yesterday was a blow-out.

I slept in, because having church at 1 pm allows that kind of decadence...
As I started breakfast, it started to dawn on me that this wasn't a typical Sunday - it was stake conference, which starts at 10.
I looked at the clock - 9:50.

I don't know about you, but I can't pull myself together in ten minutes. Ugh.
So I'm afraid I totally whiffed that one.

Hubby informed me that the kids wouldn't be over either - it's football playoff time, and they had plans to watch some game with the in-laws.

...What do you do when a free day drops in your lap?

I pulled out all the new toys I got for Christmas (that I haven't even had time to open yet,) and made cards all day.

I got off to a slow start - I haven't worked with the paper goods since... Well, since my daughter in law moved out of state.
So it took a while to get the creative juices ...moving. (I can't say flowing, because they're still not - I'm reminded of that commercial where the swimmers dive into a pool filled with caramel...)

Anyway, I was able to crank out quite a few by the end of the day - some valentines for the grans, a couple just to try out some cute little doily tags that came in the mail the other day, and a few to try out some new dies.

Guess what? Making cards is much messier business than painting.
My room is a disaster.

Good times, good times.

Hubby was all excited for the roast that he had bought for Sunday dinner.
A chance to use yet another unused Christmas gift - the new crock pot.

Unfortunately, when I went up to get said roast out of the fridge - it wasn't a roast at all, it was a corned beef brisket. Ick.
I've only cooked one of those once, when I made an Irish meal for St. Patty's day. Haven't made it since, because I really didn't care for it.

Very disappointing.

Hubby and Melissa both looked like they were having a hard time cutting it, so I didn't even try it. (Chewing issues.) I enjoyed a vegetarian meal of carrots and potatoes.

Last time I let hubby go to the store alone...

Today is a work day, but after that my week is wide open. Got to fill it up with appointments though.
Doctor, dentist, neighbor visits - and I've got to make a run down to visit my youngest and take care of some financial issues.

Busy, busy, busy.

Monday.
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Changes

Last night as my head hit the pillow, for some reason a line from Hamlet's soliloquy ran through my mind:

"O, that this too too solid flesh would melt. Thaw and resolve itself into a dew!"

It made me smile as I thought; Amen brother, I wish that too!
(What a great weight-loss theme that would make.)

I know it's resolution time, but I really don't want to join the rabid weight-loss crowd - on the other hand, I have been feeling the uncomfortable results of the holiday goodies, and have been trying to rid myself of them.

I have no delusions of ever getting back to my high school weight. (In truth, that could be frightening - nothing is in the same place as it was back then!)
But I would like to feel comfortable in my own skin.

My biggest hurdle will be getting over that teen-age mindset that I still hang on to. (I can eat what ever I want when ever I want.) And apply some common sense. (Which I've never possessed.)
This year I've developed cholesterol problems and vitamin deficiencies.

It's time.

Other changes have been rearing their heads -

For some reason, I'm having a hard time wanting to listen to music.

The car has always been my secret sound chamber where I crank it up and belt it out, but I have no desire to do that anymore.
I don't really like driving in silence, but I've grown weary of the collection of tunes that I have, and talk radio just annoys the crap out of me.

I prefer books on CD, but they are costly. The library here has a fairly large collection, but they are mostly horror - which freaks me out.

So, I ride in silence.

The other day I received a booklet in the mail with college courses on CD. Wow - what a cool idea!
...History, math, science, music, art and English - all of them sound interesting to me. I'm thinking of giving them a go...

I spent the last two days working on a painting that I tried to start before the holidays, and has been sitting there mocking me ever since.

It was supposed to be a companion piece to another one I did, but what I learned was that when I substitute colors, I really need to make note of the change, because the faces didn't come out the same.
It looks fine on it's own, but when placed side by side - they don't match.

Poop.

I'm enjoying the process anyway.

I'm not the same person as I was the first time around (with the painting.)
I have to put on two pairs of glasses to see the fine details (which will make me blind in a hurry, no doubt.) ...And the hands were not arthritic before, but still, it feels good to create again, and have that feeling of accomplishment that it always brings.

Mighty Change...

My poor dog has been going through empty nest syndrome lately.

For years he has been nanny-dog (much like the dog in Peter Pan) to my youngest, who is now away at college.
He is so pathetic - when she comes home for a visit, he is her shadow - and when she leaves again, he has panic attacks.

He's been really clingy with me this past week, which is not... normal.

There's always been an animosity between the two of us, and he has kept a respectable distance.
(Because he was brought into this house against my wishes, and I knew if I showed even the slightest interest *Boom* the kids would neglect him, and he would become my responsibility, as with other pets in the past.)

...Those walls have been breaking down of late - I can't help feeling sympathetic towards him because, let's face it - we're going through the same phase.

Last night as I sat in the chair, unwinding from the days labor (painting isn't physical work - but it is stressful,) an old craving came across me again...

As a mom, my favorite thing was always cuddling the little ones on my lap.
I don't think I'll ever out grow that craving, although even the grand-kids have by now.
Not much human warmth to be had around here these days...

...So, I hoisted the poor thing up on my lap (he's older than I am [in dog years,] and it's a humiliation to him - picture lifting grandpa up to sit on your lap.) and fell asleep, sharing not human warmth, but the next best thing.

But shhh - that will just be our little secret...

*Wink*
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Peace Returns...

When I woke up Monday morning, a miracle had happened...
Everyone was back to school / work, and the world was as it should be.

Quiet.

I know I've become an isolationist - a little bunny, snug in it's burrow who never wants to leave...

- But that's not my fault.

I blame... everybody else.

I've been almost completely abandoned for the last two years (at least it's felt that way.) Hubby busy taking care of the infirmed members of his family, the kids with college and work.

I hated it at first - in fact, I had a bonafied nervous breakdown.
But, gradually (and with medication - LOL,) I've gotten used to it - even embraced it.

...And now I go wacko when too many people are around.

You just can't win, can you? LOL

It's not that I mind all the together time, I love my family - I really do...

What I don't love is all the extra meals, the added dirty dishes & garbage, the endless clutter everywhere...
And the snacks! I was just getting to where I could almost recognize a female shape, and now I'm looking like a truck driver again...

I live pretty simply when I'm alone, (cold cereal for breakfast, toast and jam for lunch. I'm only accustomed to making one meal a day.)
I eat because I have to - not because I care...

I guess what really bends me out of shape when they're here is just that it's a change in my routine.

Spoken like a true hermit, I know. (Again, not my fault.) :-)

Anyway, I digress...

What this post was meant to be about is that it's a new year, and along with that comes all the expectations of major change.

For the last decade, I've rebelled at that, and refused to play the "resolution" card.
It seemed to me that it was a treacherous evil trap - doomed to certain failure and self-recrimination, because the ugly truth about resolutions is that they involve changing habits, which, especially at my age, is difficult at best.
(Ugh - major run-on sentence.)

I was doing some reading in preparation for scheduling the music at church... (Each month of the year has a theme, and there is a conference talk assigned to that theme.)

This month's theme is; "Things That Matter Most" taken from the talk by Dieter F Uchdorf.
As I read the talk, I decided upon my mantra for the year - SIMPLIFY.
The talk was filled with good solid advice on overcoming all the noise and chaos that we face everyday, and returning to the basics - home, God, and family.

Favorite Quotes:

"Therefore, it is good advice to slow down a little, steady the course, and focus on the essentials when experiencing adverse conditions."

"It is said that any virtue, when taken to the extreme can become a vice."

"...Do all ...things in wisdom and order, for it is not requisite that [we] should run faster than [we have] strength, [but] it is expedient that [we] should be diligent, [and] thereby...win the prize."

"We would do well to slow down a little, proceed at the optimum speed for our circumstances, focus on the significant, lift up our eyes, and truly see the things that matter most."

"To strengthen our relationship with God, we need some meaningful time alone with Him."

...And finally;

"Be still and know that I am God."

Good advice for any situation - financial struggles, loss of a loved one, major decision making, or just loneliness.

My new theme for the coming year.
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...By the way - did you know that "bonafide" is not in the dictionary any more? (at least not Bloggers)

Sheesh. What's this world coming to?

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1.1.11

I just wanted to post today so I could put up that number... *snicker*


Happy New Year!

I know I kind of abandoned my blogging project a little early, but truly, it has been so boring around here lately.

You know how it is at the end of Christmas vacation when all the togetherness starts to get on everyones' nerves, the holiday trappings start to feel like so much clutter, and although being able to sleep in till 10:00 is nice at first, it gets to the point that you only stay in bed because there's no reason to get up.

Yeah.

This is the part of that Christmas song that goes: "...And mom & dad can hardly wait for school to start again."

Thursday was just another work day, and another storm day.
My youngest went to Brigham City to spend New Year's with her friend - even though all of us did our best to talk her out of it.
(Hmmm - I wonder what side of the family she gets the stubbornness from? ...meh, it's a toss up.)

Friday, it was me who got bull-headed. It was my first weekend off since I can't remember when - and a holiday to boot!
So I let everyone know that I planned to spend the day locked in my craft room, and didn't want to be disturbed. Surprisingly, they left me alone.
(I think Hubby secretly likes it when I paint.)

It's been an eye-opener to me what a creature of habit I've become. I do everything so regularly, that it's almost a ritual for me;

*up at 8:30
*check the email
*eat breakfast/take pills
*errands/cleaning
*nap or work

It was also evident when I went for drives with anyone - there are certain spots on the road where I always change lanes, certain exits I always take - certain corners to turn. If my rules are not followed, I become anxious and edgy...

...Well, you get the drift.

That schedule has been turned upside down for the last 3 months, and I've been bounced around by everyone else's needs/wants. It gets jarring to my nerves, and I need quiet time to myself to pull it all together again.

I spent the day painting until the light got so bad I couldn't see anymore.

Hubby had to work until 11 Thursday night, and I was worried about him having to be on his injured knee that long, but he got along ok.
He slept most of the day on Friday, but I'm sure he needed that...

New Year's Eve was pretty dull. In fact, I got so bored that I headed upstairs to go to bed - but looked at the clock and realized, it was only 8:30!
Melissa saved the day by bringing down her stash of DVD's. We picked The Young Victoria. We're all Anglophiles and history buffs here (nerds) so that worked for us.
It ended precisely at midnight. We said Happy New Year and went to bed. (After a quick text to a couple of the kids.)

Are we exciting or what?

2010 was a beast that I'm glad to see go, hoping for a better 2011.

Happy New Year!
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"Ring out, wild bells, to the wild sky,
The flying cloud, the frosty light;
The year is dying in the night;
Ring out, wild bells, and let him die.

Ring out the old, ring in the new,
Ring, happy bells, across the snow:
The year is going, let him go;
Ring out the false, ring in the true."
- Alfred Lord Tennyson, Ring Out, Wild Bells

*Note: I always want to sing this hymn in Church, but it's too hard for my organists to play, and it's a buggar to lead too, so... Enjoy!