If I Had the Voice of an Angel...

I can do things. I can.
I've never coveted anyone else's talents either - except one.
I wish I could sing.

I LOVE music. It resonates in me the way that nothing else can.

When I was little, my mom taught me to sing parts with my sister, and from that day on she signed us up to sing for every church program, family reunion, and funeral that came along.
It freaked me out back then, because I had such a fear of being in front of large groups (still do), but I enjoyed it somewhat anyway, because it was something I loved to do. You could find me on warm Summer evenings, swinging on the swings all by myself, belting out a tune to the sky.
Oh for those days...

Later on, when I was in high school, my sister had the notion to sign us up for the music competition. She had been learning to play the guitar, and we practiced our song for weeks and weeks. Finally the day came for the judging. They hated the song we picked, but other than that, we would have done well - if it had been a solo. The judges had nothing nice to say about my voice. (I'll keep those comments to myself, thank you very much.)
Thinking as a child does, it never occurred to me until that moment that I wasn't any good.

Fast forward to motherhood - one of my favorite moments of the day was when I could sit and rock my babies to sleep while I crooned lullabies to them. Imagine my disappointment when my daughter (before she could even talk) would raise her hand up and put it over my mouth! (Ouch!) ...and later when she could talk, it was always "don't sing mom."

So, banned from singing in the house, my car had to become my soundproof booth. Only in my car can I belt out whatever and whenever I feel like it. I find singing such a release. I can have the most stressful day on earth, and drive around singing my brains out, and come home ready to face life again. It has that effect on me. It makes me happy.

Other than that, I have consigned myself to sing in the church choir. Not that they think I'm any good either - it's just that they are so hurting for members that I'm just another warm body to fill a chair.

You can bet that when I lay this body down, and no longer am subject to its limitations, the first thing I'm going to do is to break into song, all the way through the sky - Just try and stop me then!
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